sitting and reading my friends' blogs, only to realise that soon i'll be gone again and that will be all i can do to keep in touch with them for the next nine months. it's a tough feeling, knowing that'll i'll be going back to this place that i've shelved away but in a compartment that is far too big to be ignored.
nagging fears are coming back. maybe this year, i'll just suffer in so many ways. maybe i'll lose all my friends and make more new enemies. maybe i'll just be forgotten. maybe i'll burn bridges before crossing them. maybes and maybes. it's always the things we cannot know for sure that scares us the most, and as much as i know about what i should expect when i arrive back in chicago, there's so much that can go wrong.
so right now all i have are little thoughts in my head that weave in and out of my consciousness trying to tell me i'm right or wrong. who knows what's going on anymore? it's 21 days till i go back...
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