as before, i'm having problems dealing with how well things seem to be going. there is nothing contradictory about that statement. remember all the stuff about planning for failure? what people tend not to say is, if you spend all your time planning for failure, when success is achieved, one has very little in the way of preparations for dealing with it.
that is not to say that i've arrived at a very good place. there are always things to improve. for one, i need to seriously sort out my financial situation. decadence has struck me again, and it's time to reign that in, to live more within my means. time management has become increasingly important. and academically, there are many more places for me to explore and become proficient at. but really these are real challenges with real responses, which means they are necessarily easier to take care of than the more amorphous things.
such as my utter lack of sociability. somehow, i've become content to sticking within a very narrow circle, as if all the other things i'm doing makes up for the fact that i haven't been putting in any effort at all to make new acquaintances. perhaps it's something i should change. after all, it can't hurt to have more friends.
the above was so insignificant. in my heart there is a certain emptiness that becomes more profound because of stability. the question remains: how to proceed, treading lightly...
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